It is an obvious thing, the energy of The Land. There is a magic, a medicine here that is undeniable, tangible, real. If you have spent time here, you know what I speak of. Healing, Sacred, Beautiful. I love this place fiercely and with all my beating heart. Here is where I first learned to keep fire, where I first really picked herbs for medicine and wildcrafted for food, where first I was truly able to commune with the moon, the river, the elements. It was here that my husband and I had ceremony and swore ourselves to each other, it is here that we first had a home together down by the river in our Tipi, and it is here where we now raise our children and have built our homestead. This Land, this river, will always have my heart, my reverence, my gratitude.

It was the Solstice! The Summer Solstice when I first came to this area, it was for the North Country Fair and I was 17 years old. My best friend and I got our names on a pre-festival volunteer list and packed her fathers little truck and we made the journey 3 1/3 hours west of our little town, and my life was forever changed. 17 years later Ive never missed a Fair, always volunteered, and now even have coordinated my own team of volunteers for the past 9 years. That first year going up before the festival and volunteering set in motion so many things, and the festival itself opened up my world and my view and just everything. I grew up in a very small town with largely narrow views, and I was always comfortable being different, but had never had the experience of others being comfortably different, you know, freak flags flying! old dudes in colorful clothing grooving….like really grooving on the dance floor, all manner of fantastical attire, music and expression! It was shocking and liberating!

The Fair is where I met my Tribe, my true chosen soul family. That first year volunteering, sitting and painting is where I first spied a young man in tattered black leather patchwork that was later to become my husband and it was also that year I first heard whispers of “The Land”, a piece of property that had just been bought by the people who put on the Fair. I remember it so well, the small bits of talk I heard of this place. Several years later the Fair moved from its place along the lake in a nearby hamlet to its new and forever location at “The Land”. It was then that the magic of the festival spirit met with the magic of The Land and I and so many others fell in love with this place.

You see, it must be noted that the Fair has a potent medicine and magic unto itself. The best moments of life exist in the forever twilight hours of a northern summer solstice night, dancing wildly as the sun comes up at the stages, journeys through the morning mists, full out jams around the Fire, laughing and singing and music and synrchonocities and wonder and connection and beauty! The fair is a place where people really truly get to be, and enjoy themselves in a space that is removed from normal time, fair time is its own entity, and in that space and time all ones talents and light and expression has platform to come forward, and connections are potent because everyone is being a true and best version of themselves. Yes the fair is a medicine into itself, and an integral part of the medicine and magic of The Land.

Another thing must be noted! For near 10 years now even more magic and meaning has graced this landscape as another beloved and incredible festival creates beauty and music and art and just insaneness here on The Land. Astral Harvest is an amazing, intentional, phenomenally vibed festival put on by another group of incredible people who rent The Land for the event. I am not involved in this one at all as far as planning goes like with the fair, so I just get to enjoy the festival for the most part, it is fantastic! I feel so  blessed that I live somewhere that has these events, like really, I just have to pinch myself sometimes.

Yes, so it was near 12 years ago that I first actually arrived upon these grounds for the Fair at its new site. I was immediately calmed and comforted. I had been here in a dream, I recognized the first meadow (the festival grounds) and the treeline and the green and the river. The mists rolled in as we set up camp in a spot I now harvest rose and spruce. A few days later, on Solstice night, I took my first real wander around The Land, and even now it is mysterious to me. The spirits of the land and river spoke to me that night as I walked through the trees and meadows that now are familiar haunts and places I wildcraft and call home. Over time I have come to discover what some of those messages, those potent portents meant, others still remain lingering beneath the veil, just beyond my understanding because of things not yet come to pass. My experience on The Land that night was Mystical and forever remains with me. I was connected to this place, I knew that then, and although I could not know how everything would unfold, in reflection, it is easy to see the clues and synchronicites along the way, the symbols and signs singing to me of this place, of its magic and meaning and significance on my path.

It was the following autumn where it came to be that my husband and I , friends for many years, began to fall in love. It was that following Fair after that where we came to the land for the first time together knowing that we belonged to each other, for real, for good, for always. For me this place has always been connected to him, and our lives and stories are weaved into the landscape of this valley. That first year here together we were gifted a Tipi and we picked our campsite that grew to be our first home and love together, a place where we camped and stayed and loved for many years before we knew we would live here, build a home, and raise our family. My heart thrived here, it became our combined passion to come and stay any chance we could, more than just the week of the Fair or for Astral.  No matter where we were or lived we made it as often as life would allow and more. I literally used to cry every time we left, it tore me apart. The best times were when we would say to hell with normal life and just stay another few days. All the while in “normal life”we were jumping around from house to house and city to city trying to find our “home” and really just always longing for here.

After we were married (here of course, in a pumpkin patch he grew for me in a far meadow!) it became important to me to become more involved in the community. My husband and his family had been involved with the Fair and the association that put on the Fair for most of his life, and that is what allowed us the privilege of our campsite and coming to stay here for so many years beyond just festival time. I had independently been volunteering with the Fair for many years, so it was natural to further become a part. There is something so unique and special about our community. Near 40 years ago a small group of what could best be described as “back to the landers” or “hippies” came and settled to this area, setting up an off grid homestead only a few miles from the land. They created a community together with common goals, they started the North Country Fair, a summer solstice, arts and music festival that has been going on nearly 40 years and is an important mainstay of music and culture not only in the northern area, but for the whole province. The association also had going for many many years the North Country School, an alternative, solar powered, wood heated school that was art, music and nature based. When I talk about the “association” sometimes I have to laugh, cause often others cant quite grasp it, and that’s why I say we have a special and unique thing going. We are a non profit, volunteer run organization, a very eccentric and eclectic group of opinionated individuals (sometimes our meetings are definitely like herding cats, ahaha) with a common interest in the societies objectives , including but not limited to promoting and providing arts, music and education in our area, promoting and demonstrating the use of alternative energy systems, promoting sustainable agriculture and organic gardening practices, fostering volunteer opportunities, promoting appreciation of the Northern Boreal Forest, and fostering a respect for the Earth, Family and Self. I am so proud to be part of this group of people and so grateful that my children and family have this community. 40 years ago, them here doing this was radical! And even today, for our area and part of the world, it still is.

You must be wondering how it is that we actually get to live here? Well, first off, we asked. We were living in Saskatoon,SK when I found out I was pregnant with our first child, we swiftly came back to Alberta and ended up here at The Land in December 2012 staying with our friend and caretaker. We needed a place to stay and he had been in an accident and needed some help around the off grid abode. It was that winter that we asked the association if we could live here, build our home, grow our food, raise animals and our children. We were given the opportunity basically in exchange for our stewardship and service to the society, and because it was understood that our lifestyle would be in line with so many of the objectives of the association. What that relates too is so many hours a year helping out with whatever needs helping with around here. We love this place though, it is easy to pour our time into it because we love being here, we love everything that this community stands for. Being here, raising my family here, means more to me than anything, it is a dream, it is a blessing, it is a meaningful gift that grips me at times with pure joy.

The story of living outside (in our tipi and then in a canvas tent)  with a newborn baby into the beginnings of winter as our home was being completed enough to keep us warm our first year actually “homesteading” is another tale, one that I couldn’t even weave into this post. I will say in the 4 years we have made our full time home here, we have been tested in sincerity. I feel like The Land needed to know we meant it, so we have been tested and continue to be. This chosen life is not straightforward, it is challenging and at times heartbreaking, but it is worth it, and it is rewarding beyond measure. I am surrounded by natural beauty and splendor. Myself and family are living ever closer to how I believe people should live, simply and in tune with nature. My heart has never known this kind of happiness, I fall asleep every night and wake up every morning with a prayer of gratitude in my thoughts, in my heart and on my lips.

Thank you, friends, for allowing me to share this with you. Some stories just need to come out, and this was one for me. Next post I will be returning to some wild craft and wild recipes!

Toniese